Personal Benefits to Playing Board Games

Posted on February 12, 2016February 9, 2016 by Matthew Laker

Board and card games have been part of my life for a long time. Back in high school, I use to play “Axis and Allies” with a friend for hours on end. Growing up, there are a few games I remember well, like trying to set up “mouse trap”. To be honest, I do not remember much about the game, just my sister and I trying to put it together.

When I was dating my wife, we would go see my parents and often the weekend included games. When my wife and I went camping we would play “phase 10” for far too long. Now with our kids often Friday nights we play board games. In 2015, the game of choice for us was “Ticket to ride”.

It is fair to say board games are a big part of our family life. Thus, I have compiled a personal list of why I think we all should play board games. There is no scientific research, just my personal observation.

5 Personal Reasons you should play more Board games

1. Playing board games builds relationships.

A number of guys in a church I was a part of would get together from time to time to play board games. It was not some official church thing, just one guy called another and there we were. It was a great way to get to know people and build relationships. At the same time, I have watched in our family how it has helped build relationships with my kids and provided good family memories. Like when my wife would make me play “phase 10” so much that after the 15th game I gave in and would let her win. The trick is making her think she won. To be honest, it provides better space for conversation to happen. “If you want to get to know people, invite them over and play a game.

2. Playing board games engage our minds and mental health.

Games engage our brain and help work this muscle in different ways than perhaps take place in other areas of our life. Like any muscle that does not get exercised, it loses some ability. Games are great ways to help engage our minds. I have seen how they can relieve stress, boost creativity and I suspect that someone somewhere has research showing how it can improve brain function. As well, when you play with others, there are mental health benefits that come with community.

3. Playing board games help develop decision-making practices.

I have seen this more as I watch my kids, but it has made me start to think. Board games can help us learn to develop strategy and learn the skill of making decisions. In a way, it provides a safe place to learn and develop these skills. This is not just for kids though, I see crossover for adults to learn and become more confident in themselves.

4. Cutting the cord off the screen.

It is no secret that we are watching the screen more and more, in whatever form that may take in your life. There can be good and bad in that. However, if you are looking to decrease your screen time, consider board games with others.

5. Fun and play

I am realizing more and more as an adult we often stop playing. We need to enjoy life and play. There are so many benefits to other areas of life that come out of this.

Ok, so this is not scientific observations, but personal observations. I am not making money from any board game company. Though if any want to send my family a free game we are open to it. These are five observations I believe as to why you should play more board games in your life.

Do you have a favourite board game?

A Foundational Tip For Decision Making.

Posted on February 3, 2016February 1, 2016 by Matthew Laker

Do you need to make a decision?

Is the decision you need to make causing tension in your life because of the ripple effect?

How do you make a decision?

We all have our default way of making decisions. Today let me share a helpful tip for making decisions that comes from watching a movie with my kids.

I was watching the movie “Dolphins 2” with my children. In the movie Dr. Clay Haskett, the owner/manger of the aquarium, needs to make a decision regarding the release of one of the dolphins as it has been successfully rehabilitated after its rescue. The idea of releasing the rehabilitated dolphin though, creates tension for the characters involved because this may result in losing another dolphin. The rules state that dolphins have to be in twos. This wouldn’t be such a problem, if it were not for the fact that the second dolphin is what the aquarium had been built around. At the same time they have a strong emotional attachment and relationship with the dolphin that can never be released back due to a disability.

Have you ever had to make a decision that will have a ripple effect of also losing something you love, enjoy or that is good?

In the midst of trying to figure out what to do Dr. Clay grabs a drink one night with his father. During the conversation the father reminds his son about a napkin. When the aquarium first opened , written down on a piece of paper were three words—three words that would be the guiding principle of what they wanted to accomplish and who they wanted to be.

The words were: “Rescue, Rehabilitation and Release.”

It is at this point that Dr. Clay is reminded about who he is and what he is all about. He makes his choice knowing the implications, but sticking to who he wants to be and what is good for the dolphin involved.

In making decisions in our life we need to understand and know the why of what we want to do.

Taking time to write down a statement about why we do what we do or want to accomplish, can help us make choices in our life. For Dr. Clay in the movie he was reminded about who he is and, who he wants to be and the mission\purpose of the organization.

What about you?

Take some time this week to think this over.

Do you own a business or have an idea for one? What is it you want to do? What is the why and purpose?

I think doing this in our own personal life is of great benefit as well. Creating a life plan is one way to go about this. Keep it simple and if you need help, please let me know. I would be willing to coach you through that. Send me an email matthew@matthewlaker.com

Knowing the why and what we want can help us make decisions in our life.

Our Values drive our time Management.

Posted on January 29, 2016January 24, 2016 by Matthew Laker

Many people I speak with are struggling with time management. Often there is a tension between unrealistic expectations and the many responsibilities people have or are given.

In all of our lives, we have values we wish we had or want to embrace and then we have the real ones. Sometimes those real ones are destructive. Sometimes the real ones are good. Sometimes we wear a mask and are ashamed or are not willing to actually admit what we are valuing in life.

Try this exercise:

Take a piece of paper and take a look at your schedule over the last 30 days. Where are you spending your time? Here are some examples of things to look for:

How much time did you sleep? How much time did you work? How much time was there for fun and relaxing? How much time for investing/serving others? How much time checking email or watching media? For a moment, think that you are looking at someone else’s schedule. Based on where they spend their time what would you say are things they value?

We see whatever we deem important. Whatever we deem more valuable, that is where we spend our time.

Does where you spend your time align with what you have stated are values in your life?

For the Jesus follower, the question becomes do we trust Jesus enough to lead us to a different set of values? Is how we use our time guided by the reality of the gospel in our life? Are we investing in the things that Jesus has said will lead to a full life?

As you do the above exercise you may notice you need some changes in your life. The first step to moving in that direction is to understand the “why.” Why do you need to change? Why will seeking a new habit, or embracing a new value in your life, be good for you?

Whatever you value will be what determines your direction and use of time.

Check out this post on why identifying Values is important.

Give your Brain rest

Posted on January 27, 2016January 24, 2016 by Matthew Laker

I love getting out into nature, especially fishing. During the summer, I will often take the family out hiking and explore the forest. Picnics are also a major outing for my family in the warmer months.

Getting out into nature has a restorative effect in my life.

David Stayner (Yale School of Medience) holds a hypothesis that being in nature allows the “Brain’s command center, to dial down and rest, like an overused muscle.” Through his research, he is discovering just how much nature restores us and demonstrates this with hard data.

“Our brains, he says aren’t tireless three-pound machines; they’re easily fatigued. When we slow down, stop the busy work, and take in the beautiful natural surrounding, not only do we feel restored, but our mental performance improves.” (National Geographic January 2016 – Florence Williams interviewing David Stayner)

There are many times in the daily rhythm of my life I get so focused on a task that a mental fatigue comes over me. I have learned through this that just as other muscles have a need to be rested, so does my mind.

There is a theory called “Attention Restoration Theory”. It was developed by Rachel and Stephen Kaplan in the 1980s in their book The experience of nature: A psychological perspective. It shares that being in nature, or looking at nature pictures, relieves stress and mental fatigue caused by both work and everyday life.

In Canada, something like 80 percent of people live in urban settings and about six cities in particular. This has an effect on our physical and mental life. Research is revealing that those who have access to parks and trees will have a higher quality of life.

In my own life getting out and going for a walk during my day helps me not only physically but it helps me process my current projects and better experience life . If I am at the office I will sometimes walk down to the river where there is a little spot by some flowing water and sit for a few minutes.

As I take care of myself I am learning about the power of nature. Winter proves to be my most difficult season to get out, however, I have to make the choice to get out more and learn to dress for the weather.

Have you ever thought of your brain as a muscle?

What are rhythms you can add into the weekly schedule of your life so you can get out into nature?

[sh_quote]Here are five things I have found happen when I give rest to my mind:[/sh_quote]

A. I have a better perspective on life

B. I become more creative

C. My stress is lowered

D. I build better relationships.

E. It helps foster my faith.

Do you need help to work on improving your physical and mental life system? Who could help you with that? Is there a place for a life coach here?

Getting out into nature has a restorative effect in our lives.

It is a rhythm that helps us enter, engage and experience the life we were created for.

3 Challenges to my Physical fitness

Posted on January 13, 2016January 10, 2016 by Matthew Laker

hiking If you want to enter, engage and experience the life you were created for you must develop personal care.

It was the spring of 2015 and I was in the midst of some evaluation in my life. I realized during this exercise that I had not been taking care of my physical self. I had gained weight, I had not kept good rhythms in my sleep life, and though I ice fished, it was not enough physical activity.

Seven months later I have been consistently going to the gym and watching more of what I eat. Personally, there were three tough steps I had to take to redevelop the habit of physical activity.

1. Eating

I love to eat and I can eat a lot. I eat when I am stressed. I eat in times of celebration. I eat when I am bored. However, I had to get my physical eating under control. The next seven months were a challenge, but there were two things that were helpful to me:

A. I gave myself a cheat day. My cheat day was Friday. My reason for is this was that Friday was family night and so I loosened up on what I ate that day.

B. I have been using the app “myfitnesspal” to help track what I eat. It is not perfect, but it started to help me track what I eat. Slowly I would make changes.

Seven months later I still struggle with this but have become more aware of what I eat and am making better choices. I do not think this battle will go away, but controlling my food and not being controlled by it must stay at the for front in order for me to embrace, enter and engage the life God has created me to live.

2. Time

I remember sitting in a coaching setting and being asked “do you want to do it?” “Yes” was my answer. “Then how will you make it happen?” “ I need to schedule it.”

If I was not going to block off time, then I really did not want to make it happen. The truth was I had to work around work and family. I had a conversation with my wife about how I could make it happen in our life. I still struggle with taking charge of my time as each week comes with new challenges. I have had to learn to be flexible , to have a plan, and to be creative. At the same time though, I need to remind myself not to worry about what I have missed, and instead push ahead and stay on track the next day.

3. Mental

This is the hardest one in many ways. The crazy thing is after I go to the gym I feel so good. Sometimes though, I believe the lie that other things are more important. There are, however, some things that may be just as important. I have learned that if I do not take care of myself, I cannot be all that God created me to be.

I have had to remember the why factor in this process many times. For me, there are a few why elements. Two of them are:

a. To feel better about myself and deal with stress.

b. It helps me to improve the quality of my work.

I have had to give myself permission to go to the gym. I have to say no to other things so that I can go to the gym. I have to give grace to myself when I missed the schedule and not give up but pick up at where I should be in the moment.

I am not sure where you are at or if you can relate to one of these struggles I have. However, taking care of your physical self is a crucial element of your life.

If you want to enter, engage and experience the life you were created for you must develop personal care. Seven months later I am doing better and I celebrate that. I still have areas I would like to improve on and I keep on that journey one step at a time.

What about you? What are your struggles? Any tips?

What are the habits you need to develop to better take care of yourself?