Every pastor will have his or her different ways or recommendations on this subject. It is always something I recommend for any couple looking to get married. Pre-marriage counselling is for the young, old, and yes even if this is a second marriage or more. Each situation is different and unique.
“Counselling can give you insights into where your particular relationship dynamics might be heading in the wrong direction.” ( Lynne Foote )
When I sit with a couple who have sought me out for pre-marriage counselling, there are three objectives I have. They are:
1. Understand the gospel/biblical perspective of marriage.
Just what does the gospel say about marriage? Check out this post on “How Does the Gospel Inform us on Marriage?”
2. Understand your relationship dynamics – This involves two aspects:
Understanding yourself and your partner and how the two interact
at the moment at Sunnyside Wesleyan Church (2014) we are using a program called Prepare-enrich.com
Teaching life and relationship skills
Taking time to reflect upon yourself and your relationship will only help generate a stronger relationship.
“Premarital therapy sessions will give you the opportunity to discuss things that do not come up in normal conversations, such as hurtful past experiences, sex, and expectations. ” ( Racheal Tasker)
3. Affirmation
This may seem strange but the process is there to help with discernment. The intention is that the couple would get married. However, this also provides a healthy environment for assessment of the commitment one is going to make. Marriage is not just a declaration about current love, but a resolution for the future.
What has been your experience with pre-marriage counselling? What questions do you have about it?