As I enter a New Season – One Tip for starting a new season

Posted on September 16, 2016September 14, 2016 by Matthew Laker

In the summer of 2016, I find myself starting a new season in life. This new season results in a new town, a new church, and a new job. This new season comes with the normal emotions of fears and anticipation of what is ahead. As I begin this season I am reminded of a question asked to Jesus. In a way, his answer is some great advice to remember when starting a new chapter of your life.

In Mark 12: 28-34 Jesus reminds us of the two greatest commands–that if we embrace them, no matter the season, they will help us enter, engage and experience the life we were created for.

For many followers of Jesus we know this teaching, most likely we have heard it many times. Sometimes we know what we should do but fail to take the steps in that direction. In any season, but especial as one begins a new season, getting back to core basics is needed. Sometimes in our life journey, we need to hit the pause button and remember the basics and then take steps to realign life where it has gotten off. For myself, as I start a new season, this is something I am keeping in front of me.

Jesus deeply values relationships. He values our relationship with him and he values our relationships with others. This is the simple truth of how nothing is more important than relationships.

A driving force for God’s people is placing value on relationships.

Recently I was talking with a young person in university and we were talking about the need to volunteer in order to help them gain work and life experience. I reminded her that the volunteer work will help her build relationship skills for any direction she finds herself in down the road.

We were made for relationships. A life without relationship is empty. Throughout the gospels, we see Jesus speak about his dream for our life. That dream leads to us living a flourishing life, at its core, has us placing a high value on relationships.

As I enter a new season, or perhaps you find yourself entering a new season, remember that placing a high value on relationship will help you embrace, enter and experience the life you were created for.

As I begin this new season this is one value I am continuing to keep in front of me. It does not always mean life is easy, but the relationships we nurture bring great benefits to our life.

True or False? You Can really be anything you want to be?

Posted on November 13, 2015November 9, 2015 by Matthew Laker

“You can be anything you want to be,” was one of the cultural beliefs I remember hearing throughout my school years. Today this idea still seems to be a basic foundational belief in our culture.

The reality is this is just simple not true.

When American Idol first came out, people believed they were going to be pop stars and no one could tell them differently. It is true though, that someone could be rejected in that setting and still have the strength and talent to become a pop star, but the reality is, many could not. At the end of the day, many people still pursue a dream that does not align with their strengths.

This is a hard lesson to learn and accept in our life. At the same time just because we get a rejection, does not mean the dream is over. We need to adjust, and work out of our strengths. Working out of our strengths will give us greater opportunity.

As a follower of Jesus I see a connection to one of Jesus’ parables where there is a master who gives a certain amount of money to three individuals. The expectation is they invest it and then they can succeed with it. One person is not greater than the other, but each is given an amount based on their strengths and ability. If they accept that reality and work from it they can experience God deeper and have wholeness in their life.

Tom Rath in his book “Strengths Finder 2.0” shares “you cannot be anything you want to be — but you can be a lot more of who you already are”(Rath 8).[1]

Many people in North America work to try and hold up an identity they believe will bring them success. Many of us run after a false identity for too long. As I have watched and journeyed with others, the reality is we cannot be anything we want to be, but we can still be successful.

I believe we have God-given strengths that are unique to every person. Yes there are commonalities in people, but if we can understand our strengths and play to them, we can find success in life.

The greatest barrier to this will be accepting reality and not idolizing a dream that is false. If we work out of our God-given strengths, a wholeness can take shape.

Here are a few questions for reflection:

1. What are your strengths?

2. Based on your strengths, and assuming you fan their flame, how will this effect the direction of your life?

3. What skills are you needing to develop?

4. What is one step you can take this week to build on your strengths?

You may have a dream that is just a dream. However working out of your strengths will help you enter, engage and experience wholeness in life.

[1] Rath, Tom. StrengthFinder 2.0. Gallup Press. Kindle Edition.

Time management a road to the life you want (part 1)

Posted on October 19, 2015October 19, 2015 by Matthew Laker

Personal time Management will help you enter, engage, and experience what you were created for.

As I journey with people, one of top tensions or challenges in people’s lives is related to how we spend our time. Many feel stressed out as they hack away at the “to do list” and responsibilities in life.

In my personal journey, and as I have walked with people, working harder is not going to help. Working smarter will help you move.

Try one of these suggestions and you just may start to see improvement. You could also work through each one step by step to steward the time you have.

1. What is important to you?

Take some time and answer this question.

2. Prioritize your work.

Let’s start right now. Break your day down into three phases. Copy the table below into a document or write it down somewhere.

What are the have-to’s in each of those slots? Fill it in.

	Monday	Tuesday	Wednesday	Thursday	Friday	Sat.	Sun.
Morning
Afternoon
Night

You may need to create a work table and a home life table. When at work, what are the priorities on Monday morning? What is a reasonable expectation of the tasks you can complete?

3. To do list for the day.

Organize that list into a first priority, and second and so on. What can wait and are ongoing projects? As you approach the day this will help you know what needs to be done. Put your to-do list into your calendar. Actually schedule each hour.

Example: At 2:00, I will work on such and such a task.

4. Focus on one project and finish it.

You will increase your effectiveness if you can focus longer on one project:

“multitasking may seem efficient on the surface but may actually take more time in the end and involve more error. Meyer has said that even brief mental blocks created by shifting between tasks can cost as much as 40 percent of someone’s productive time.” (Joshua Rubinstein, PhD, Jeffrey Evans, PhD, and David Meyer, PhD, http://www.apa.org/research/action/multitask.aspx)

So finish one project.

Personal time Management will help you enter, engage, and experience what you were created for.

From the backseat to the driver’s seat of life.

Posted on October 12, 2015October 12, 2015 by Matthew Laker

Are you taking control of your life?

When we were in the car one day, one of my kids spoke up from the back seat and asked, “can we go there? I would like to.” However, they were not the ones in the driver’s seat, I was. Given my role as a parent in their life, I get to take the driver’s seat.

Who’s driving your life? Do you feel as if you are in the back seat and someone else is driving your life? Do you find that your agenda is often filled more by responding to another’s agenda or needs? Are there things you would like to do, but do not feel you are the one driving the car in your life? Perhaps your parents are still driving you around?

Do you want to take control of your life?

How do we get out of the backseat and drive?

Many people want to live a life that counts. Many want to have an impactful career. Some carry dreams of having great impact on those around them. Some want to leave an impact in their neighbourhood or in a certain field. Many just want to get out of the hamster wheel they feel they are in, one in which they are running hard and not going anywhere. However, to do that you are going to have to get out of the backseat of your life.

The number one thing to do to get out of the backseat of your life and drive is to:

1. Choose it.

Do you really want it? Why do you want it?

It is going to take work and self-discipline. On a scale of 1-10, how much are you willing to change in your life?

In my circle as a follower of Jesus, sometimes we do not like the self-discipline idea because we think Jesus will make it happen. Now I believe very much we need Jesus in our life. However, the life that he calls us to is one that involves self-discipline.

To be self-disciplined involves taking the driver’s seat in our life. It starts with not just I should, but I will and here is why:

This is really a mental shift and will be hard for many. You are the only one who can make this choice.

If you are serious about making changes then there are steps you can do to help.

a. Life plan

Most of us have dreams and things we would like to accomplish. At the same time if we are going to steward the resources we have, we need a plan. We only have so much gas and time.

If you would like some help in this area, feel free to contact me about life planning and coaching. matthew@matthewlaker.com

Check out this post for how a life plan can help.

A second step to help move from the back seat to the driver’s seat is to ask yourself:

b. What new habits do you need?

Looking at your life, what are the habits that need to change, or be picked up, for you to move forward?

Understanding your “why from above” will help keep you going in developing a new habit.

Are you ready to get out of the back seat and take control of your life?

What is one step you will take today?