Six spokes to a flourishing life

Six spokes to a flourishing life

Six spokes to strengthen to a flourishing life.

To many of us go through life unexamined. We fail to see the habits we have and ways of thinking we have that have led us to where we are. As one senior lady shared with me over coffee,

“we are a result of our choices and have to take responsibility for that.“  

We have a choice to who we are going to listen to.  

We have a choice about how we are going to respond to our thoughts.

We have a choice to the habits we choose to form in our life.

As a follower of Jesus, I also believe because we forget God, and not listen to who he says we are, we stay stuck.  

As I look at people’s lives, there are about six areas that we need to work on to help, engage, enter and experience a flourishing life.

These six (maybe seven) areas overlap and are intertwined. 

They are 

Relationships – First there is our family(biological and adopted), Second is close friends or community, Third is working relationships, those we encounter in different parts of life. 

Mental – So much of our life is determined in this area. How we think affects more then we know in our life. 

Financial – This is the resources and money of our life.  

Spiritual – This one may be a challenge for some, but I carry a world view that holds this as a component of our life.  

Career – We need to work and work is good for us. This area looks at our occupation and calling. 

Personal and Physical – This is about physical health and what gives you energy in life. 

Sometimes I have thought of each of these areas as a spoke on a bike wheel. If one of those spokes becomes weak the tire begins to fall apart.  

For most of us, we can not make significant changes in all the areas at once. However, you can make small winnable habits. You want to change your life; it is one habit at a time. 

Over the next 90 days, what is one spoke you need to focus on and one habit to move you in a healthy direction?  

Reasons I do not reach my goals.

Reasons I do not reach my goals.

Failing to reach your goals can be a hard reality to face. However, let’s face the music about why we failed. Here are four reasons that often lead to not reaching goals in my life. 

1. I did not review the goals each day and week.

You have to keep the goals in front of you and the steps you need to take to reach them. It is about focus, and when you do not review them and make sure they take priority, other things will take that space. 

2. I did not have quarterly reviews and make pivots where needed

One of the good things I have put into my life that has been helpful is seeing life through 90-day sections breaks it down into doable moments. It helps me stay focused.  

At times, however, I have failed to make pivots and adjust the goals to fit new information or reality.   

3.Unrealistic expectations

I am guilty of this one through and through. I try to set too many goals and fail to reach them at times due to not having realistic expectations. 

I am all for setting big goals, just have struggled with not giving enough time to get things done.  

At the same time, many of us fail to understand how small steps over time can lead to big things.  

4. Coach 

 I remember the first time I had a coach journey with me for a year. It was great to have someone to think through my goals and what needs to happen next. I was able to work through challenges and obstacles and develop a way forward. In a way, they are like accountability partners. 

As you look to the next season of goal setting, who is going to help you?

Reaching our goals are about one step at a time. What is one thing you would add for not reaching your goal this year?

Worry less about motivation and think habits

Worry less about motivation and think habits

I have been thinking about motivation. How do we find it? Do we need it? What is the definition of motivation?  

The dictionary definition of motivation carries with it the idea of our reason or why that pushes us forward.  

One might ask what motivated them to do that? A good question as it gets to the why of a movement. 

In everyday conversation, however, some might say I need to find the motivation to get this done. As if it is like some extraordinary power out there, we need to drum up. But what if that is the wrong road?

Now hear me finding the why to our goal or task I believe to be necessary. Any time I sit down with someone to help them develop goals, often I will ask why is that important?  

I am wondering what if it is less about finding motivation, and has more to do with developing habits and rhythms and routines that lead to the goal we want to reach.  

I suspect for many people. It is in the routine or rhythms of life that distract us and take us off course. It is not an easy task to develop a new habit or to do something a different way. Many times it can hurt, at least in the short term.  

As I write this, I am wondering what if it is habits that lead to motivation. An object can sit still and never move, but an object in motion generally stays that way. There is even the possibility it can increase. A question we most likely need to ask is short term routine do I need to change or adapt or schedule to start to move me in a direction.  

At this point, I am wondering, so how do I make the starting point easier?

This idea also means I do not sit around for something to inspire me, I know my reason, and so schedule a habit.  

I may have to work through my obstacles, but those are not there because of a lack of motivation.  

What are one or two habits over the next 30 days you need to implement to reach your goal?  

What do you think? Is it motivation or habits?

10 Questions for your End of Year Wrap up

10 Questions for your End of Year Wrap up

“Victory does not happen by accident.” I first heard that line read as someone was giving a leadership talk, and it has stuck with me. I now add to the line, “Today, I will be intentional with my time.”

As part of trying to be intentional with my time, for several years, I have taken some set time to review my past year. There are several things I consider and reflect on from my spiritual life, relationships, and work-life.

One of the biggest reasons I do this is that victory does not come by chance, and so I will be intentional with my time. I have also learned that I may not be able to do everything, but I can do some.

Here are Ten questions to ask at the end of year wrapup.

  1. What are 3-4 things you can celebrate this year?
  2. What activities brought joy to your life this year?
  3. What was the most restorative rhythm you did you this past year?
  4. Looking back over the year, who do you need to thank for their role in your life?
  5. What did you learn from your pain/failure/struggles?
  6. Review your idea week, what is working, and what is not, what needs to change?
  7. Review your yearly, or 90-day goals how far did you get on your goals? What is left to do?
  8. What are 1-2 personal goals for the year ahead, and why?
  9. What are the 3-4 work goals, and why?
  10. What are the steps needed to accomplish this goal?